Surprise... Butt Sex?

This is my actual horoscope via Twitter for today...

(I wish I was making this up)...


"Sexy Venus is flirting with Uranus in your sign today, tempting you to say yes before you even know where you're going.


You may be seeing green lights, but keep in mind that things could change instantaneously if you don't stay aware of everything that's happening around you. Avoid any unpleasant surprises by focusing on the present moment throughout the entire day, instead of always thinking about what's next."


Listen Twitter...

A. Exit only.

B. Maybe YOU should focus less on my sex life and more on the fact that "ParanormalBlacktivity" is actually a trending topic at the moment.


Green light my ass... Wait, no.